It's not abt me today tho. It's Kenny our loyal Logistics manager who apparently
feels unwanted and pissed and upset and helpless 'cos he's being kicked out of our club for doing one wrong thing: getting caught for sleeping overnight in our clubrm. He was clearly, undoubtedly at fault, but the punishment dealt him will be another story.
If I were to take his words seriously, yes, he placed too much trust and hope into this club, expecting to be someone impt and to hv fun till his poly yrs ended (4 yrs). He put in 1.5 yrs of work, but he's not alone whn he argues tt it's nt recognised. He's right to be angry 'cos he now has nowhere left to go. He had no backup plan for when he would leave the club or when he had to transfer his title to some freshie. He spent too much time getting laid back frm lying on the clubrm floor (doing so means you are comfortable and at peace w the club). He had a refuge for whn he wanted to skip class. Now he'll probably be skipping school if he were stupid enuf to carry thru w what he said.
He was indeed vulgar in every aspect concerning this incident, not caring for his future nor the implications it would deal him. He barged into the room during the LunchShow shoot and demanded what was happening with the keys, esp after we had seen Kwee Chek abt it. And wanted it back. He approached Chin Kai abt it, and flared at him. Chin Kai yelled back tt he nor any exco was at no obligation to pass the key ard. Thn began Kenny's barrage on how long we've been thr, what the hell he was in exco for if he couldn't hv the key, and tt he might as well be kicked out already.
I had to rush down to the LunchShow to give Zi Hao a tape as the other memory card reader died. When I came back, Kenny had stopped his ravaging the clubrm for his effects and had started haranguing and crying about slogging for the club tt didn't appreciate him. he never turned down shoot requests at all, always harried us to do this n tt so we could get things done, contributed a lot, scolded ppl for their own good, claiming he treated Chin Kai like a bro and told him personal things but he nvr reciprocated. And screw CCTV footages KC said he saw, 'cos clubrm CCTV didnt work. He had a right to know abt whatever it was tt concerned him. It actually didnt concern him. Only the part whr we couldn't say anything to him abt wat KC said... which was nth much but 'he's giving me trouble".
After Kenny left, Chin Kai broke down, but I think it was out of sheer pressure and shock in facing the brute force head on, but he did a good job. Only he didn't sympathise or rly understand Kenny's position, simply stating he would feel like bacteria if he were in Kenny's shoes. He even told him multiple times to get out of the clubroom, or go see Kwee Chek when the issue (Kenny's key) was in CK's pocket.
I cried too, but it was for Kenny and not frm shock. The insurmountable pressure of sudden hopelessness dawning on you, like a child realising he was cheated all his life to believe Santa was real. His pride, ego and sense of belonging in the forge of a clubrm key was all immediately stripped of him. I felt the despair and fears of nothingness descending on Kenny, and so I cried for him. I couldn't at tt time recall any of those wonderful times we had back thn but I felt the weight of a burden long unborne.
